Social and cultural aspects

Social control of sexual activity

Societies differ remarkably in what they consider socially desirable and undesirable in terms of sexual activity and consequently differ in what they attempt to prevent or promote. There appear, however, to be four basic sexual controls in the majority of human societies. First, to control endless competition, some form of marriage is necessary. This not only removes both partners from the competitive arena of courtship and assures each of a sexual partner, but it allows them to devote more time and energy to other necessary and useful tasks of life. Despite the beliefs of earlier writers, marriage is not necessary for the care of the young; this can be accomplished in other ways.

Second, control of forced sexual relationships is necessary to prevent anger, feuding, and other disruptive retribution.

Third, all societies exert control over whom one is eligible to marry or have as a sexual partner. Endogamy, holding the choice within one’s group, increases group solidarity but tends to isolate the group and limit its political strength. Exogamy, forcing the individual to marry outside the group, dilutes group loyalty but increases group size and power through new external liaisons. Some combination of endogamy and exogamy is found in most societies. All have incest prohibitions. These are not based on genetic knowledge. Indeed, many incest taboos involve persons not genetically related (father–stepdaughter, for example). The prime reason for incest prohibition seems to be the necessity for preventing society from becoming snarled in its own web: every person has a complex set of duties, rights, obligations, and statuses with regard to other people, and these would become intolerably complicated or even contradictory if incest were freely permitted.

Fourth, there is control through the establishment of some safety-valve system: the formulation of exceptions to the prevailing sexual restrictions. There is the recognition that humans cannot perpetually conform to the social code and that well-defined exceptions must be made. There are three sorts of exceptions to sexual restrictions: (1) Divorce: while all societies encourage marriage, all realize that it is in the interest of society and the individual to terminate marriage under certain conditions. (2) Exceptions based on kinship: many societies permit or encourage sexual activity with certain kin, even after marriage. Most often these kin are a brother’s wife or a wife’s sister. In addition, sexual “joking relationships” are often expected between brothers-in-law, sisters-in-law, and cousins. While coitus is not involved, there is much explicit sexual banter, teasing, and humorous insult. (3) Exceptions based on special occasions, ranging from sexual activity as a part of religious rites to purely secular ceremonies and celebrations wherein the customary sexual restrictions are temporarily lifted.

Turning to particular forms of sexual activity, one learns from anthropology and history that extreme diversity in social attitude is common. Most societies are unconcerned over self-masturbation since it does not entail procreation or the establishment of social bonds, but a few regard it with disapprobation. Sexual dreams cause concern only if they are thought to be the result of the nocturnal visitation of some spirit. Such dreams were once attributed to spirits or demons known as incubi and succubi, who sought out sleeping humans for sexual intercourse.

Petting among most preliterate societies is done only as a prelude to coitus—as foreplay—rather than as an end in itself. In some parts of sub-Saharan Africa, however, petting is used as a premarital substitute for coitus in order to preserve virginity and avoid pregnancy. There is great variation in petting and foreplay techniques. Kissing is by no means universal, as some groups view the mouth as a biting and chewing orifice ill-suited for expressing affection. While some societies emphasize the erotic role of the female breast, others—such as the Chinese—pay little attention to it. Still others regard oral stimulation of the breast unseemly, being too akin to infantile suckling. Although manual stimulation of the genitalia is nearly universal, a few peoples abstain because of revulsion toward genital secretions. Not much information exists on mouth–genital contact, and one can say only that it is common among some peoples and rare among others.

A considerable number of societies manifest scratching and biting in conjunction with sexual activity, and most of this is done by the female. Sadomasochism in any other form, however, is conspicuous by its absence in preliterate societies.

An enumeration of the societies that permit or forbid premarital coitus is complicated not only by the double standard but also by the fact that such prohibition or permission is often qualified. As a rough estimate, however, 40 to 50 percent of preliterate or ancient societies allowed premarital coitus under certain conditions to both males and females. If one were to count as permissive those groups that theoretically disapprove but actually condone such coitus, the percentage would rise to perhaps 70.

In marital coitus, when sexual access is not only permitted but encouraged, one would expect considerable uniformity in frequency of coitus. This expectation is not fulfilled: social conditioning profoundly affects even marital coitus. On one Irish island reported upon by a researcher, for example, marital coitus is best measured in terms of per year, and among the Cayapas of Ecuador, a frequency of twice a week is something to boast of. The coital frequencies of other groups, on the other hand, are nearer to human potential. In one Polynesian group, the usual frequency of marital coitus among individuals in their late 20s was 10 to 12 per week, and in their late 40s the frequency had fallen to three to four. The African Bala, according to one researcher, had coitus on the average of once or twice per day from young adulthood into the sixth decade of life.

Marital coitus is not unrestricted. Coitus during menstruation or after a certain stage of pregnancy is generally taboo. After childbirth a lengthy period of time must often elapse before coitus can resume, and some peoples abstain for magical reasons before or during warfare, hunting expeditions, and certain other important events or ceremonies. In modern Western society one finds menstrual, pregnancy, and postpartum taboos perpetuated under an aesthetic or medical guise, and coaches still attempt to force celibacy upon athletes prior to competition.

Extramarital coitus provides a striking example of the double standard: it is expected, or tolerated, in males and generally prohibited for females. Very few societies allow wives sexual freedom. Extramarital coitus with the husband’s consent, however, is another matter. Somewhere between two-fifths and three-fifths of preliterate societies permit wife lending or allow the wife to have coitus with certain relatives (generally brothers-in-law) or permit her freedom on special ceremonial occasions. The main concern of preliterate societies is not one of morality, but of more practical considerations: does the act weaken kinship ties and loyalty? Will it damage the husband’s social prestige? Will it cause pregnancy and complicate inheritance or cause the wife to neglect her duties and obligations? Most foreign of all to Western thinking is that of those peoples whose marriage ceremony involves the bride having coitus with someone other than the groom, yet it is to be recalled that this practice existed to a limited extent in medieval Europe as jus primae noctis, the right of the lord to the bride of one of his subjects.

Sexual deviations and sex offenses are, of course, social definitions rather than natural phenomena. What is normative activity in one society may be a deviation or crime in another. One can go through the literature and discover that virtually any sexual act, even child–adult relations or necrophilia, has somewhere at some time been acceptable activity. Homosexuality is permitted in perhaps two-thirds of human societies. In some groups it is normative activity, whereas in others it is not only absent but beyond imagination. Generally, it is not an activity involving most of the population but exists as an alternative way of life for certain individuals. These special individuals are sometimes transvestites—that is, they dress and behave like the opposite sex. Sometimes they are regarded as curiosities or ridiculed, but more often they are accorded respect and magical powers are attributed to them. It is noteworthy, however, that aside from these transvestites, exclusive homosexuality is quite rare in preliterate societies.

In conclusion, the cardinal lesson of anthropology is that no type of sexual activity or attitude has a universal, inherent social or psychological value for good or evil—the whole meaning and value of any expression of sexuality is determined by the social context within which it occurs.